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DOWRY

In its fight against female genocide in India, the 50MM has marked the practice of  DOWRY as its STRATEGIC TARGET.  You can join the “War on Dowry” movement on facebook (click here)

What is driving the female genocide in India?  What is the linking factor that is causing the systematic and targeted annihilation of women through feticide, infanticide and dowry murders.  This is the question that we at the campaign have been asking.

After 3 years of observations, research, surveys, cases, discussions, and analysis, the conclusion we have reached is that none of the following is a factor in India’s female genocide : economics, education, class, caste, religion, and community. It involves the educated and wealthy, as well as the poor and uneducated, a conclusion also reached in a recent High Court verdict. In an infanticide case the Court concluded with this statement, “60 years of independence and so-called modernization has not changed the societal attitude towards the female child. Across the board; rural or urban, educated and uneducated, rich and poor, the skewed sex ratio adverse to the female child is a sad mirror image of the social thinking even in the 21st Century.”

So what is driving the female genocide in India?

The answer:   A vulgar, chronic, and criminal GREED for dowry.

Dowry in India today has become the no.1 method of criminal extortion through the infliction of blackmail, torture, violence, and murder of women.

Every son born into a family is greedily viewed as the ‘golden goose’ who will bring in the fantasized wealth through the dowry they will demand when he gets married.  So families want more and more sons.   There is no end to the wealth demand even after marriage, and if the woman is killed, the son can marry again.  For another dowry! Why kill, why not just divorce?  In the case of divorce, there is always the chance that the woman or her family will demand their dowry money/ items back.

The families that are consumed with hoarding dowry, are the same ones that also do not want to pay dowry to other families.  Hence, not only do they torment and kill women who marry into their families, but they destroy daughters in their own families through selective female feticide, infanticide and the killing of toddlers through starvation and deliberate neglect.

Dowry – the practice of easy wealth acquisition is spreading like wild-fire in India.  Communities, regions and religions that never traditionally practiced dowry, have now jumped on the band-wagon.  Along with this there is an uncontrolled increase in the murder of women and girl infants and an exponential increase in female feticide.

As of yet the system of law and order in India has shown little inclination towards bringing this situation under control.  It is riddled with corruption and incompetence, and many in the government offices, police and medical establishment themselves indulge in dowry and female feticide.  The possibility for change through the official channels therefore is bleak.

What  then would be the most realistic and doable method at the grassroots level that would guarantee a visible impact for change in the shortest possible time.  When we are talking about human lives, time is of the essence!

The 50 MM’s strategy is to target the custom of dowry, specifically addressing girls, women and the families with daughters. (Extortionists have no conscience.  So we don’t think it is any use negotiating with them.)

In our ‘WAR ON DOWRY’ the following messages will be the focus of our PUBLIC projects:

  • A man who needs his in-laws to fund his family incessantly is not fit for marriage.
  • It is foolish to pay dowry to a family that is torturing your daughter and could ultimately kill her.
  • It is wiser to spend that money on enabling your daughter to be secure and independent through education and or her own business.
  • Your daughter’s life and safety is more important than her marriage.  Parents must make that their prerogative.
  • Treat the first dowry demand, before or after marriage as a death threat and either don’t marry your daughter into that family or get her out immediately.  Don’t every send her back.  In most cases that is when the girls get killed.
  • A family that extorts for dowry is lowly, criminal, and perverse. Why would you want your daughter to marry into that family?  Would you feel proud being related to people like that?
  • In a country where there are 50 million more men than women – it is the woman’s prerogative to choose a good groom.  Women and their families MUST recognize that the choice is theirs!  They must choose wisely.

JOIN US IN THE WAR ON DOWRY HERE ON FACEBOOK

 

 

62 Comments leave one →
  1. June 7, 2010 6:35 am

    “It is wise to spend money on enabling a daughter to be secure and independent through education or her own business…” –
    a big YES from Germany, from a father of two daughters: banker + architect …

    • Anonymous permalink
      August 9, 2011 9:05 am

      True, I too have the same opinion.

  2. Aditi Pal permalink
    June 18, 2010 5:23 am

    Please stop this discrimination. I am from a family of two daughters and we both take care of our parents financially and personally. It doesnt matter which gender your child is. Proper development as a good human being is important. Why do the young men in India still accept dowry.

    • RITU PRIYA permalink
      June 30, 2014 5:08 pm

      Ii feel shame on the well educated young men of India who are still educated only grabbing degree…but mentally they are still very backward.

    • RITU PRIYA permalink
      June 30, 2014 5:10 pm

      I really feel shame on the well educated young men of India who are still educated only for grabbing degree…but mentally they are still very backward.

  3. Neil Pharr permalink
    June 21, 2010 11:18 pm

    The dowry system has created so much death and suffering for women in India. I think that one should support women, human values and the desire for a better future for women by NOT ATTENDING any wedding where a dowry is offered by the bride/bride’s familly.

  4. Meeta Choudhury permalink
    June 28, 2010 1:40 pm

    well written article but I think it is the attitude and tradition which we have to change

    • THE 50 MILLION MISSING CAMPAIGN permalink*
      June 30, 2010 5:43 am

      Thank you Meeta. That is the idea of this campaign — to change the social attitude by challenging it. People do know it is wrong. They reason they persist is because there is a social permissiveness. Everyone does it — so it’s ok. But we have start saying that — it is not ok. That it is criminal!

  5. October 12, 2010 2:29 pm

    Let’s join hands for a worry free world!

  6. December 22, 2010 6:19 pm

    it’s a great campaign and I hope, some governments will hear about your efforts;
    beside all the sad news from INDIA, on the one hand:
    thanks for sharing so many wonderful photos from INDIA on the other hand!
    greetings by

    http://denkuebungen.wordpress.com

    my bilingual think-training …

  7. Anadil permalink
    December 23, 2010 2:25 pm

    I am from Pakistan and believe me this trend continues here and is penetrating the communities that had never practised this shameless custom ever before..however many dramas and talkshows are addressing this issue, directly or indirectly..many are doing the exact opposite.. many educated boys are now standing up against their families and refusing to accept dowry from their in-laws..
    India has bollywood, India has Amitabh Bachan, India has Shahrukh Khan..Why cannot they be a part of your campaign? If average Pakistani soaps can potray the handsome protagonist as not taking dowry, Bollywood can do wonders…I am not married as yet but I vow that when I do get married, it will be to a nice guy who is dignified enough to sleep on a bed bought by himself and not by my father!!

    • December 24, 2010 4:43 am

      @Anadil — We absolutely agree. A man who needs his father-in-law to fund his married life is not yet fit for marriage!!! The current trend of t.v. shows unfortunately have been doing just the opposite! Shows like “Balika Badhu” etc. are glorifying child marriage and their ratings are very high. When shows try to combat issues like dowry and child marriage, their ratings drop — so the producers don’t want to address these issues. But the government despite its laws has not intervened.

  8. Anonymous permalink
    December 29, 2010 2:25 pm

    1. Women look at marriage proposals from men who don’t want dowry. After marriage stay strong on not feeling pressured by their silent “expectations” of gifts (dowry)! 2. Make sure you save some money for an emergency situation. 3. Make sure you always keep company of your own family and close friends. Careful of people who will tell them things you say. 4. Educate yourself and get work experience for at least two years before marriage. You will have confidence and faith in yourself to tackle any situation in life. 5. Make wedding an opportunity to show your skills and pride: using your own savings for important purchases, organizing it together with him/ Mr. Right. I believe if two people can survive organizing a wedding, and make peace on so many issues involved, respect and spend on each others’ choices; then in-laws, kids, schools, etc. will be no problem ever! 6. When you walk out of a confirmed bad situation, never look back. It is still great to respect them from a distance (especially if there are kids involved) but you must trust your intuition (not fears!). 7. Believe that when one door closes, another will open right when you least expect it. You can make a good choice no matter what others will say or do.

  9. Anonymous permalink
    October 17, 2011 8:45 am

    GIRLS NEED TO EDUCATE THEMSELVES IN TRUE SENSE AND RECOGNISE THEIR OWN WORTH…RATHER THAN TO DEPEND ON OTHERS AND TAKE THE SITUATIONS AS THEY COME TO THEM

  10. Anonymous permalink
    October 17, 2011 8:46 am

    MUGDHA OJHA

  11. November 25, 2011 7:59 am

    Hi,am from India. In my opinion when the dowry tradition will be remove from the marriage system than dowry deaths will stop, but in legally we have more laws like women and law,dowry prohibition act,in India but they are not strictly implemented. So dowry word came from tradition we want to fight on dowry tradition.. for this awareness is more important.
    i supported this campaign..

  12. emery permalink
    December 15, 2011 10:41 pm

    dowry is the Auschwitz of this century!

  13. Loretta Morgan permalink
    December 21, 2011 1:39 pm

    It’s true. Dowry killing is like the Holocaust. The Holocaust was well planned and intentionally done and so is dowry killing. This should be referred to as the Indian Holocaust. Then maybe you will get more attention from Western media which could put international pressure on the Indian Government to act responsibly.

    • December 22, 2011 10:23 am

      @Loretta — That is why we are using the term ‘Genocide’ instead of terms like ‘sex ratio’ or ‘gender ratio’ which the media both in the west and in India prefer. Terms like sex ratio further dehumanize this disaster. In fact there was a western newspaper report recently that said something like, “Of recent there has been a shortage of women in India!” Campaign director, Rita Banerji, has strongly objected to this perspective, and has pointed out how in interviews, sometimes even western journalists ask her questions like, “If women had jobs would there be less incentive for their husbands and in-laws to kill them for dowry.” Rita says, that this kind of a question would never be asked by western journalists of domestic violence victims in the west. So why is it that they ask that of women who are victims of dowry murders in India?

  14. emery permalink
    December 28, 2011 12:48 am

    i found evidence that this is not about religion. the taratory of Ladakh in Indian Kashmir is 50% Buddhist and also has a major problem with elimination of girls. The demographics of Ladakh prove this. in 1951 the sex ratio was 1011 females per 1000 males. in 2001 it was 805 females per 1000 males.
    source

    http://www.abodehimalaya.com/trip.php?country=Ladakh&cat=Demographics-in-Ladakh

    • January 8, 2012 6:18 am

      @emery — You are right. This is no longer limited to Hindus in India. Over the last 15-20 years, the practice of dowry has spread to all other religions and communities and along with it communities that never had female infanticide earlier now are seeing an increase in both infanticides, female feticides and indeed dowry murders! This includes matrilineal communities in Kerala, and the north-east, as well as Muslim, Christians, and even tribal communities.

  15. emery permalink
    December 28, 2011 1:06 am

    i found evidence that this is not about religion. the taratory of Ladakh in Indian Kashmir is 50% Buddhist and also has a major problem with elimination of girls. The demographics of Ladakh prove this. in 1951 the sex ratio was 1011 females per 1000 males. in 2001 it was 805 females per 1000 males. As a Buddhist myself I’m varry worried about this trend. So clearly every Religion in India has blood on its hands in this area. Now people can stop saying this is a campaign is against Hindus or Muslims or whatever religious group you happen to belong to. I had the integrity to point out my relgion’s role in this problem first. if anyone has a more details about this please post the information. clearly in every relgion there are also people trying to make a difference as well.
    source

    http://www.abodehimalaya.com/trip.php?country=Ladakh&cat=Demographics-in-Ladakh

  16. January 17, 2012 1:50 pm

    we hate dowry system ……..gone are d days when girls were silently suffering torture from their in-laws for dowry…….because todays parents have made their daughters …quiet capable of standing on their own feet………so no question of mental harassment…by the inlaws……….and difference should not be made between a boy and a girl……..because a girl can also—like a boy manage her own self……………

  17. swati permalink
    February 1, 2012 2:10 am

    For heaven’s sake DON’T GET MARRIED into a greedy, abusive, manipulative family! If enough women agree to matrimonially boycott anyone who squeaks about dowry, the custom could end today!

    The problem is that women consider marriage a fundamental right. Newsflash! Marriage is not your birthright! Develop the ability to care for yourself (and your parents) economically and shun the men till they grow up! DO NOT compromise on this, being single is not the end of the world.

    • emery permalink
      March 2, 2012 12:35 am

      swati i couldn’t agree with you more and on top of that hears another newsflash for the Indian women living aboard You DON’T necessarily have to marry an Indian man! dowry is becoming a problem in the Indian community in the west too. but for those of you in the west you can avoid the whole mess by looking for partners beyond the boundaries of your closed society. most westerners don’t know dowry from a hole in the ground. more and more westerners are developing an interest in Indian culture every day so don’t worry about not being accepted by most westerners. as for your own community if they insist on acting like neanderthals then I for one say the hell with them! maybe if enough of you did this it would get the Indian men in the west to act right.

  18. Anas permalink
    May 15, 2012 2:42 pm

    Dowry should be given by the man, to prove that he is capable of supporting a family.

    Men who demand dowry from the girl are not ‘men’, they are sissy eunuchs.

    • emery permalink
      June 4, 2012 11:51 pm

      Anas there is a similar practice in the middle east to what your talking about. I don’t know exactly what its called but i do know the effects of it are devastating. they include women and girls being sold like cattle to men with money and men without money becoming terrorists in a desperate attempt to save up enough money to buy a wife. so while your idea sounds good it will only cause as many problems as it solves. the only real solution is for the whole dowry system to be destroyed and the sooner the better.

  19. August 7, 2012 10:48 pm

    Surely there is world full of eligible men …Indian women could look further than their own country for a partner ?

    • August 10, 2012 1:48 pm

      That’s an idea. Wonder what the men would do if we removed all the women. Their are women sex-trafficked as brides from one part of India to another, and there are women being trafficked for this from across the borders too, like from Nepal and Bangladesh. Check out this post on ‘Bride trafficking’

  20. September 26, 2012 7:54 am

    Dowry one of the most henious crime of India. Girls get awaken not be silent, not crucified ur self in name of Prestige n Pride. Put them such greedy people in the Jail. Boys should take a pledge they never take dowry n stop such thing in their surrounding then definitely it solved otherwise it always a issue to discuss.
    “Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no
    one thinks of changing himself.”
    ― Leo Tolstoy

  21. December 22, 2012 2:26 pm

    Many womens and their family suffering due to dowry. Dowry should be removed from marriage.

  22. Edia permalink
    December 26, 2012 2:42 pm

    To place an order to remove the dowry.

  23. Jessica permalink
    January 8, 2013 12:29 pm

    I’m a woman from the” West” & I wasn’t really sure what a dowry was. I’m so sorry this is happening to Anyone. I was directed here after reading about the poor girl that was gang raped & have been reading up on this ever since I heard about it. I wish you all the best luck in succeeding in getting the dowry to be illegal & stopped & for better laws & swift action by the police when complaints are reported. I have signed all the petitions I can find relating to this. I hope & pray everyday that this horror will be stopped. Stay strong & don’t give up the fight!

  24. April 11, 2013 2:58 pm

    Even if young men don’t want to accept dowry they yield in to social pressure.In our society, more the dowry the greater the respect you earn from the societal point of view. Mostly elders in the family put pressure. Even the otherwise law abiding people do not fear of stern dowry laws and openly exchange gifts in the name of pompous shagun ceremonies without fear as they have never seen law to be enforced before the bride is killed. Groom’s family often put pressure on bride’s family for such ceremonies. Girls’ parents too come under huge pressure of gatherings that they often give gifts and cash (read dowry) to the extent which is out of their pocket. I wonder why not raids are done at this juncture so that the menace is nipped in the bud.

    • April 11, 2013 3:12 pm

      In view of my above comment I think we need a campaign to abolish such ceremonies which encourage gender bias and the persons involved should be caught red handed while taking dowry in the name of gifts by raiding such premises, in order to deter others from doing so. It is strange why otherwise law abiding people don’t take dowry laws seriously! I have seen even the educated people think it is their right to get gifts from bride’s family. Gifts for accomplishing what, I fail to understand.

  25. April 17, 2013 4:44 pm

    As a student in the West studying Gender in Development, I am especially interested in the structural causes of female subordination. From conversations I have had with both men and women in Delhi, it seems that whilst the dowry is heavily frowned upon, it is still enjoyed. For example- listening to a conversation between a journalist and a woman looking after her dehydrated child in a hospital ward I learnt that the young mother was proud of the dowry her family had been able to bring. She boasted of the new cars she had brought to the family, the jewelry and cash. I sat there wondering how dowry could be so glamorous for some, whilst a death wish for others… Perhaps some people don’t take dowry laws so seriously, because they don’t see it as a harmful crime. It must be especially difficult to pursue the war against dowry if some social groupings in such a vast society see only benefits, whilst other, poorer groupings struggle to keep up with payments and unreasonable demands…

  26. Nikki Caulfield permalink
    May 31, 2013 7:45 am

    Such a sad and horrible practice! As a mother of an 8yr old girl, it makes me sick to think what happens to other girls her age in India… If they manage to make it to that age. I can’t wrap my head around the sheer level of lateral violence that goes on in Indian culture. Do the women in-laws not remember what it was like for them? That they think it’s okay and acceptable to inflict such torments on other women? Are they proud to have a greedy murderer for a son? Marriage should be about love, not money! My heart goes out to all who are affected. I wish you well and to have the strength to fight this terrible system. Don’t give up hope, the world is watching.

  27. Avni permalink
    June 4, 2013 2:44 am

    I am a 27 years old woman with a 498a and 406 case running in the court of law. After my marriage, I was told that my in-laws and husband didn’t want a working wife. I scarified my education and career for the wellbeing of a family life. Eventually, my in-laws and my US return husband started torturing me so that I should ask my father (who is a retired army personal, retired in 2000) to repay the 16 lacs of loan taken by my husband for his education in the US. When I didn’t agree to this my in-laws and husband put my jewelry on mortgage without my permission and never gave those back to me. All the paper work are present in the Banks to prove that they had taken the jewelry loan. The gold jewelry costs 7 lacs. For a retired army personal belonging to the middle class its quite a huge amount. When I asked for the jewlry my hand was broken. I was not allowed to talk to my parents. I didn’t have a phone. My plaster was removed early than prescribed by doctor so that I could do the house hold stuff. My hand has thus ben deformed permanently.

    When you say that by putting a case of 498a, brides try to harass in-laws and husbands, let me tell you what happened to me. The officials who was supposed to do an investigation, SUPPORTED MY IN-LAWS completely. During the seizer day, my maternal uncle-in-law pulled me out of the house, pulled me by the broken hand, INFRONT OF THE POLICE, and no one came to help. Despite making a mention of all the jewlry in the FIR, the only things I was given in the name of stridhan were a couple of sarees and petticoats and blouse. Of course, the expensive sarees were not given (may be my mother-in-law is saving it for her next daughter-in-law. )

    My husband’s bail has been rejected and he should ideally be behind bars, but he is enjoying his wrok in a Noida based IT company. The police being aware of his whereabouts are not arresting him. His parents visit him often and are sightseeing around Delhi. And the IO calls my father and me at regular interval to know about the where about of my husband. Despite he having all the knowledge, he really didn’t do anything. Me and my family is being humiliated, harassed, and of course, my father’s honestly earned money has gone for a toss, including my education and career. All the proofs are there but there is no one willing to listen or assist. NOW TELL ME…whom should I cry out for help?

  28. ioana permalink
    August 27, 2013 5:11 am

    It is unhuman what is happening! Girls have the same rights like boys. It should be like this. That situation has to stop right now. I am from Romania, I don-t know many things about India but here we have gipsy girls . Their familly sell them when they are married, and the age is very little. ( 13-14 years) .

  29. Pooja Jindal permalink
    September 19, 2013 3:29 pm

    Yes, Dowry is a big reason for Female Genocide. But I feel the tradition of “Kanya Daan” is biggest or root culprit. As a girl is supposed to leave her own home after marriage, parents have less motivation to have a girl child. Once they have a girl child then due to emotional attachment they want to make her happy. But unfortunately they have accepted that they can make her happy only by marrying her and sending her to somebody’s else home. To keep her in-laws happy they need to arrange money and they think that they are doing it for her daughter. So daughter seems as a burden to them.
    Moral is that the rule of sending women to her in laws after marriage is absolutely bull-shit.
    Here, I am not saying to reverse the rule. What we are suggesting is following.
    Normally while finding spouse, we set some criteria like age, looks, financial status, education, place of residence etc. etc. Similarly we can put some condition that whether I want to shift or I need somebody to shift with me depending on the convenience and requirement of both the families. But by default, imposing on one gender is a crime.
    I can say that ‘”Kanya daan” should be declared as a crime. No one should have right to donate any one.

  30. Anonymous permalink
    October 17, 2013 11:49 pm

    Well right now I am on the verge of being destroyed bec of this whole dowry trauma, I am 28yrs old, a teacher in a school and now finally I am abt to get engaged and get married to an army officer whose parents are not directly asking for dowry but their son has bought a new car worth rs. 10 lakh and they want my parents to share half of the price which my parents are. I have already given a hint to my mother that I wont get married to such a family if they keep demanding. Now they say that only branded gifts to be given to their guests. I am really worried and don’t feel right abt it and neither do my parents but bec they have publicly announced my marriage, my mother says it wud be foolish to back out considering there arent other good marriage offers. Havent spoken to my dad who is equally frustrated abt the whole attitude of the in laws but he feels they have a good family BG. I lovemy parents, can’t hurt them or insult them in public neither wanna ruin my life by marrying such a family. Plzzzz tell me what to do?Shd I get engaged which is next month?

    • October 18, 2013 12:20 am

      Dear Anonymous — PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT MARRY THIS MAN! EVERY DOWRY ABUSE AND EVEN MURDER CASE WE HEAR OF STARTS OFF LIKE THIS. YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT IN WHAT YOU ARE THINKING AND TELLING YOUR PARENTS. ON OUR BEHALF PLEASE TELL YOUR PARENTS THAT YOUR LIFE AND SAFETY IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHAT SOCIETY SAYS AND THINKS ABOUT BROKEN ENGAGEMENT. NO GOOD FAMILY WOULD DEMAND MONEY LIKE THIS. THIS IS GREEDY. A GOOD FAMILY MUST HAVE GOOD VALUES! PLEASE DO NOT GET MARRIED TO THIS MAN.

    • October 19, 2013 1:30 pm

      NOT AT ALL…no need to ask anybody, just say NO…marriage is not an indispensable thing…remaining single is far far better than getting into horrible affair…the plus point is you are on your own feet…marry only when you get a satisfactory match, how so ever long it may take…

  31. October 18, 2013 9:38 am

    Hi
    I understand that you love your parents and want them to be happy. But here you must understand that your parents shall be happy only if you shall be happy. From the demands of boy’s family, it is very much clear that you can’t be happy with that family. As far as other good marriage offers are concerned, please note that at least this offer (demanding family) is a not at all good, actually it is bad.
    Please try to make your parents realize that they want you to be happy and you can’t be happy in that family. Also marriage is not the only thing in the life to do. If we get a good life partner, well and good. If not, we should not be crazy for that. After all, in one life sometimes, we are not able to achieve everything. Just be on the right path with right spirit. And marrying with such a guy is not a right thing to do in life. Also its better to be single than leaving a hell kind of life after marrying in such a bad family

  32. RAHUL91 permalink
    January 9, 2014 3:13 pm

    AGAIN , ALL ARE TALKING ON ONLY ONE SIDE OF COIN ONLY , DOWRY IS ILLEGAL NO DOUBT & IT IS ALSO REDUCED TO GREAT EXTENT IN INDIA BUT WHAT ABOUT THE MISUSE OF THESE DOWRY LAWS AGAINST INNOCENT MEN , THEY R SUFFERING , LOTS OF SUCIDES OF INDIAN MEN ARE HAPPENING ! AT PRESENT DOWRY LAWS ARE HARDLY UTILIZED BY WOMEN FOR USE , THEY MISUSE TO TAKE AWAY MEN’S PROPERTY

    • January 12, 2014 2:35 pm

      Thousands of women are killed every year in India for dowry and you yourself say these laws are not used to protect them. Why are you so defensive about this law? More people are falsely accused of theft. Then why aren’t you people demanding that laws against theft be toned down. If you were really serious about protecting “innocent” men, you’ll be demanding that the police and courts be held accountable for the use and misuse of laws. But you are not! So what is your real issue here?

    • January 16, 2014 6:03 pm

      Mr. Rahul
      There many many problem in India, in World. And one person or a group can not fight for all. Each one of us work for the problem which either hurt us or benefit us. Atleast you are there to talk about the problem men are facing. Keep your confidence high and and keep working.
      And ofcourse, once dowry shall be removed, the laws made due dowry system in India shall have no meaning and had to be removed.
      Also this fight is for human right and it is our bad luck that no. of women victims are much much higher than male victim. So, it appears as fight for women right. NO, it is a fight for human.
      If you have some constructive idea to solve the problem (may be for men), we are with you and contribute at our level best. But yes, we should understand that in our path, we are right.

  33. January 16, 2014 6:14 pm

    Dear Ms. Rita Banerji

    I am concerned about the identity and title used for a women. We normally discuss identity problem, but I have not seen any discussion about the title. A woman before marriage is Miss. and after marriage is Mrs. I don’t understand the biased use of the title. I mean yes this shall help one to know whether a woman is married or not, but why this kind of title difference not there for men. This is true even outside India.

  34. RAHUL91 permalink
    January 19, 2014 1:59 pm

    TO ms pooja jindal & all others here , sure we must co operate with each other to sovle the problems but ..i know what is happening i m graduated B.E in Electronics student , i m boy means after eduaction to continue my life i must have a job , not job a good highly paid salary job otherwise no girl will marry me , well from girls side no pressure is available on them thats why girls who were with me during my college days are married with employed men and are happy , also persuing higher education with the financial support of their husbands . this social mentality affects boys & make their life hard , very hard , some get success ,some becomes bad or lost everything or do sucides …… but remember no. of sucides by married men , law misuse for financial profit against men is on large BY SC , women who want only money…otherwise my UNCLE would not became victim………

  35. RITU PRIYA permalink
    June 30, 2014 5:33 pm

    to Mr. Rahul,I would like to update your knowledge here that this can not be a excuse to favor dowry because as per my case study , I am a 24 yrs.old MBA qualified smart working girl and my parents searched a B.tech qualified working Boy (grabbing less salary than me in Pune ) as well as his financial status is also lower than me, but they are demanding 6 laks dowry in cash to marry me.Just think ….??? When I personally opposed then the family and the guy rejected me after making a lame excuse that they did not like the nature of my job.now you tell me is this only thew matter of your layman thinking that otherwise my UNCLE would not became victim………As for your kind information here we are trying to fight not against any financial and mental security but we are just trying to oppose the corruption takes place due to Dowry system as mentioned in the presented blog .So the next be your sister or daughter…as per your choice….

  36. rahul 91 permalink
    July 9, 2014 1:04 pm

    THE 50 MILLION MISSING CAMPAIGN
    Dowry ? huh …U ignorant ! …ANTI DOWRY LAWS ARE ONLY MISUSED , THEY ARE HARDLY USED FOR REAL DOWRY AS IT REALLY LESS HAPPENS IN INDIA NOW(EXPECT IN UP) .Still living in 1950’s india & blaming men ok ..this is what the arrogant , egoistic women do only in their lives …millions of indian men / boys are poor , lives on street , have no education & these women are still concerned for only & only their problems what bunch of self fishers !! .INdian women form last 15 yrs are misusing these 498a & dowry laws against their husbands & his parents whenever these women are dis satisfied . Because husband is only ATM machine for these women & they take his all assets, property , money through their legal dowry called as ” alimony” & still has no shame !! .From last 15 yrs every yr 65000+ indian men commits sucides & such cases are never shown in media . REcently , SC states that anti dowry laws are 90 % misused as weapon by jelted wives to take husband behind the bars . No women is arrested when husband suffers or die . only men & men are criminals !! . women are gods who are worshipped & no law is given to men to speak for his right ! I am 22 yr old indian guy , i m engineer & i will never marry a indian woman . I am going to russia for job(which is 30 % reserved for women in india in public & private sectors- a discrimination ) & i will marry a real russian woman there .

    • July 19, 2014 9:49 pm

      Do go ahead with your Russian plans. With your kind of sexist and self-righteously misogynistic attitude, that will save some poor Indian woman a miserable marriage.

    • July 21, 2014 10:10 am

      Mr. Rahul
      With all above conversation especially by you, it seems that you are not able to see the complete picture due to some bad experiences of your life and little bit biased nature. I request you to understand that first you are human being and then you are a male. There are many laws in India which are being misused by some people (female or male). So, it is the problem of human not women only. It is quite possible that some laws are misused by woman, but this is not because they are women, it is because of their sanskara. Believe me, even if these women could have taken birth as men, they might have misused some laws (means must have done something wrong). Similarly criminal male candidates must also have done some crime even if they could have taken birth as women. Also nobody is saying that men are responsible for women’s problem. We all are responsible for all our problem. There are many examples where mother-in-law gives problem to her daughter-in-law and even sometimes mother herself is biased for her male child so that she creates problem for her own daughter. But still these are few examples only. We can not generalize it to all mothers. In this forum, some victim women are discussing their problem to have some solutions. If you have any idea with which the misuse of law can be avoided, please share. We shall try our level best to use your idea. But you have keep in mind justice for real victims.

      Now if I come to your personal example of marrying a Russian woman because you don’t like the Indians, similar feeling I also have. Many time I say that “I want to marry a guy from higher latitudes.” Here higher latitudes countries are US, Russia, UK etc. The reason is very simple. Since my childhood I have seen very bad faces of men around me. These men includes my father, my cousins, some uncles also. Not only this, during my childhood I was so afraid of marriage that I would prefer dying than marrying. Once I told my father also that I didn’t want to marry. I used to think that I should die as soon as I am at age of the marriage. But when I came out of my house to study, I realize that it is not the solution. If I feel that the men are bad, then I need to understand why they are bad. What can be done to improve the situation of India. Because after-all India has given me food, shelter and education. But Rahul, this is only personal experience which may not be applicable to whole society. So, I should not be biased to only my experience. I should be open to understand the real cause of the problem and try to solve that.

      Now, if you understand me, I need your help for my fight. I feel that most of the crimes against woman are due to tradition of “Kanyadaan” as explained in my blog

      http://jindalsblog.wordpress.com/2014/02/13/kanya-daan-a-crime-2/

      I need your help to solve this problem. See, if this is solved, then we don’t need any laws to protect the women, hence no point of misusing the laws. so, actually you may help yourself by helping me.
      I hope for your positive helping response.
      I am ready to help you if you want to fight for any injustice against men. Because for me both women and men are human being first. And I am working for human rights.

  37. rahul 91 permalink
    July 20, 2014 12:06 pm

    BE more impudent & sardonic , u will feel great as u expect men will give u respect even if u don’t look at their hidden issues ..then pray for that. U call man a misogynist who fight for his troubles this could the defination of misogynist in ur dictionary but in our dictionary is called as real man ..Understand u misandrist…go ahead with ur misandrist plans lets see how long you make men fools .. https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=416312561752340&set=a.255061994544065.76487.252552044795060&type=1&theater&notif_t=like ” Masculism guided the society to the light. Poison of feminism still guiding the society to dark. Does that feminism require anymore shape? How to contest in social and democratic way? Answer to given by all, by men!” .

    • July 20, 2014 12:24 pm

      Go through the blog, click on links, and take social responsibility, then our work is done

  38. rahul 91 permalink
    July 23, 2014 9:10 pm

    @Pooja Jindal , ,kanya-daan? now your hindu culture’s kanyadan becomes crime ? right .I am not hindu nor muslim …I AM, PROUD TO SAY THAT I M BUDDHIST & FOLLOWER OF DR.AMBEDKAR & EINSTEIN .Let me tell whatever method you follow to protect & empower women is the root cause of indian men being bad ok ..i m saying this i m indian man (but will not longer remain so) ,Hinduism creates lot of traditional things were , i am saying were burdened on women in past , but all are now defeated by constitution .However , during fabrication of constitution dr.ambedkar overly trusted indian women that they will never use laws as weapon like most white ameriacan or bristish women do & this his mistake make millions of men suffer due to misuse of 498 a & anti dowry laws .Laws are biased in the favor of women . Once man is blamed he cannot be excused no matter how many times he present evidence .T O YOUR KNOWLEDGE YOU ARE WOMAN OKAY don’t you know what you are doing , you are betraying ambedkar, he said all women & DALIT MEN to follow buddhsim & let make your hindu men to understand the understand the buddhism that its the real culture of ancient india THAT GIVES every one has equal oppournity , not rights bcuz rights are ok for particular period of time if you were oppressed in past but after that it became unfair & injustice to other party.
    Now, in india its necessary to have sexual exp. only after marriage this makes men necessary to marry & hence population boost . Unlike west , where women are free minded , indian women don’t want to accept ideology & indain men want to follow the tradition while young generation’s indian men are different , they are open minded .
    YOur problem of women suffering cannot be destroyed by any tough laws & forcing men to behave as per your mentality ..try your best . women are doing this since 1908 when In USA , A group of feminist forcefully persuade govt to make alimony laws but one brave man named ernest bel fort bax protest against it . http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/The_Legal_Subjection_of_Men

    http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/The_Fraud_of_Feminism

    http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Author:E._Belfort_Bax

    http://lipmag.com/opinion/the-nonsense-of-anti-feminists-an-old-but-new-anti-feminist-e-belfort-bax-part-1/

    . Once these anti male laws amended then all problem started , in US divorce starts happening ,women were more assualted by their emotionally frustrated husbands as women were no longer gulliable, agreeable & women were marrying only wealthy men , this annoys normal men in US .Now condition is divorce rate is 74 % in US !!!! most of them are given by women . BEfore 1908 , everything was good but now feminism has made worse .This alimony & other special laws which were favouring women were called as women’s rights & then accepted by UN nation & hence finally they land in india .

    WOmen’s employment is low , its bcuz girls have not worry after graduation as they can get employed man for marriage while boys have do or die stituation – get job then only girl will come, give her all happiness then only she will remain with otherwise get divorce & lose everything .

    Your feminists movement cannot solve any problem . 1st adopt buddhism & make this indian society buddhist , then make amendments in laws esp. marriage laws to be gender neutral . make changes in 498a to favor men . Open american/russian standard schools & colleges in UP & all over indai . gIVE FREE EDUCATION TO poor boys , teach them principles of buddhsim so that they will be clam & peacefull . Give more attention on boys than girls as they are mentally vulnerable to any violence or bad things . Make women to understand that not marry only wealthy men as now are self sufficient enough to earn by yourself so marry a simple but middle class or in some case poor man .
    list continues……..

    You don’t need to afraid , millions s of good men are
    exist in india but women never recognize & care . example , during my school a girl was there who sometime talks with me & after some time when my graduation comes to end i decided that , this girl is good now i must make good friendship with her .But as good boys know whenever a good guy try to have a girlfriend , girl does not care look for those who are ready to spend money on them .Same thing happens i found her with other guy who is not loyal but was wealthy .Now she roam with him in supermarkets , malls , ..etc . All time he pays for her .

    One more thing , russian women are actually good they mostly rape men . some say men cannot be raped but repeatdly doing sex with boy or man without his mood is rape against men in russia . Russian women are arrogant . American one are feminist , cares only about their needs & always find reasons to tout against males in media. British women are lairs , out of 100 % cases of rape in UK only 20 % are real others are fake , mostly fake accused men spend their lives in prison for years till they declared innocent & still no punishment to those women who speak only lie from their mouth .
    YOu want to know whose population is decreasing in west , its males ! rapidly .

    http://antimisandry.com/female-paedophiles/big-list-female-predator-teachers-students-3668.html

    http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/jilted-doctor-who-paid-gang-3363587

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2010/sep/05/men-victims-domestic-violence?commentpage=2

    http://metro.co.uk/2014/03/12/yeung-ki-woman-cut-off-lovers-penis-and-flushed-it-down-toilet-4540227/?ITO=facebook

    ………
    & millions of cases which never comes in media

    women oftently in west hurt men & do crimes . but they are either given very less
    sentence or are such cases of man killing /suffering are not disclose in feminists media.
    Its surprising , nations where women were treated nicely BY MEN like in england ,USA , AUS now these WHITE women are treating their men very rudely & crudely IN the name of patriarchy which exist no more & are giving birth to their matriarchy.

    Finally , only japan is the nation where women are submissive & men are buddhsit . this nation does not give excessive rights to women still crime rate is very low 0.1 % . Its bcuz all policies are made by good japanese men without any interference of any woman ‘s feminist ideology . That its totally balanced & this is the nature !!! In japan a boy can have sex with his gf if she 14 or more than 14 yrs old with her consent , no need to wait for 18 yrs as they believe japanese girls get mature at the age of 14 .

    One more thing men who are involved in love & sex relationship with women are peacefull & their chances doing crimes is 0.99 % only -study says

    You decides what you like to do , i support your problems but you will never get rid of crimes against if you won’t listen to this hypocrisy that feminists play & continue to hurt boys since birth which force them to become criminal by producing extreme responsibilities on them & your feminists laws .

    .

    • July 24, 2014 11:22 am

      Saudi Arabia also officially like Japan has overtly patriarchal cultures and laws and demands submissiveness from women, and officially has low crime rates. That’s of course crime as defined by them. In Japan women put up with the worst forms of sexism, discrimination, unequal rights and the same in S. Arabia. We think you are terrified that women in the west have fought and pushed successfully for a more gender just society. Every group that is socially oppressed must do that — you should know that being a Dalit supporter? Or is your Dalit support hypocritical?

  39. August 5, 2014 10:34 am

    Mr. Rahul
    You are too biased. believe me you are not supporter of ambedkar or Buddhist thoughts even. You are just you only.

    • Rahul 91 permalink
      August 7, 2014 11:58 am

      This tarp is not going to prove anything ; i never worshiped any god or godess in my life like dr.ambedkar & albert einstein told us , who is biased & who is not is known to me . IF Ambedkar was still alive then surely he would have bring amendments in the biased laws in the favor of man 7 would have bash the whole national commission of women for playing hidden games & corruption by extorting money from married men who are falsely accused in the name of dowry & 498a , your alimony is legal dowry against men & burden of responsibilties that you put on young men & boys is matriarchy . Don.t tell me what is buddhism , you hindu women betray him & now to want say like that about me. My comment was deleted by this skeptic blog’s admin so i repost it as reply to you :” yes , this feminism has ruined our(mens& boys ) lives in an hidden manner away from the face of society . Likewise your logic , alimony itself is a legal dowry but as far as concerned it is against men that’y its okay. I Think this 50 million exaggerated every post , i got thorough almost each and every post, they just overly show each & everything against men . The traditional bindings no longer exist now in india since constitution has given lot of, even excessive rights to women .But ,men ‘s fate is written in dark ! that’why silently we suffer . Today , i read newspaper where it was shown on back page that a IPS officer is being accused for rape by a model , when gone through whole story , the defending lawyer & that ips officer were saying that its just an act of revenge by that model & he states she 1st send him friend request to him , then they chat on fb , after that they meet face to face & one day they did sex, after that he said to extort money she charged him rape . This is our broken fate rahul that even when there is no evidences & even where man repeatdly oppose , court always take side of woman . Hence , many men get trapped in such incidences . These greedy women oftenly look for their prey as wealthy or civilized men like govt. officers & trap them for their benifits bcuz they don’t care what will happen to that man ,their false egoistic accusation will ruin innocent men’s life …to become ips/ias officer one must struggle for 6-8 yrs & now that man’s life is destroyed . , nearly 60000+ married men every year do suicides either in marriage or in a relationships whenever are falsely accused or abused or sexually emotionally hurted or are deprived from sex .
      in west , men are discriminated , yea they are but western courts unlike indian one give fair chance to men to speak ! & that’s the difference , their advanced scientific method sort out what is true & what is wrong but still in US you cannot hit a woman no matter how many times she hit you , not even in your defense which is every human’s right, there are stupid laws which are made just only to extort money & harass men like biased 498a & anti dowry laws without retaining any protection to man from misuse . These biased laws are like child protection , child custody & these are obligations on men . In west many men say the court misbehave with them & harass then , even in school & colleges in US boys are falsely accused of molestation & harassed,by feminists . They think that they conquer the world by playing double game in the name of women ‘s rights but they forget some day they will pay for their hypocrisy . Men in west cannot be fooled for long time unlike our retard indian people who blindly accept women ‘s ideology . weLL ,recently a gujarat female CM delivered very disguisting speech against boys – ” Boys have to compete with girls as they are getting more educated & any boy failed to be eligible for any girl will rejected by girl as rejected maal (object ) & such boy will be considered as fuzzy & weak one ” Athough , male politician whenever say anything regarding girls no matter whether it is against them or not , media is always there to distort their speech & deliver as hate speech to people but this speech was against boys , weak & poor boys who cannot afford education & no media condemn it , what a shame ..just take a look – http://www.merinews.com/article/gujarat-cms-sexist-statement-against-boys-discernible-mens-rights-activists-demand-apology/15898597.shtml.

      http://www.merinews.com/article/another-anti-male-law-on-the-way-for-legal-extortion-from-husbands-feels-mras/15899482.shtml#sthash.AENngnFZ.fj7oZw9T.gbpl

      http://hannarosin.com/the-end-of-men/

      http://www.business-standard.com/article/pti-stories/save-family-foundation-demands-merger-of-sec-498-a-and-dv-act-114071000435_1.html

      One who is ignoring opposite gender’s issues only on the basis that he is man & looking only at her’s issues bcuz she is woman which is being cared by whole world , called me biased when i raised objection,

      I don’t want to spend my time here , neither expect anything from lair feminists women , i m preparing for TORFL to get admit in russian universities . Already told to me by lot of MRAs that like You there are lot of brainwashed feminists so any thing will not affect you no matter how many time evidences is proposed to object you & your evil feminism .”

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